The Spiritual Practice That Changed Everything for Me: A Simple Practice That Can Reshape Your Life
Over the past few years, one of the most transformative spiritual practices in my life has been learning to be still with God through silence and solitude. But let me be honest—this didn’t come naturally. At first, the idea of spending an hour alone with God felt unproductive, awkward, and even a bit intimidating. I wasn’t sure what I was supposed to do.
I remember one of my first attempts at extended time with God. I had intentionally carved out an hour in my schedule, found a quiet space, opened my Bible, and placed my journal nearby, ready for a deeper experience with Him. But about ten minutes in, I found myself staring at the wall, fidgeting, chasing random thoughts, and asking, What am I supposed to do now? My brain was racing—emails to answer, errands I’d forgotten, conversations on repeat in my head. The silence wasn’t peaceful; it felt foreign and frustrating. I kept glancing at the clock, unsure how to fill the time. Was I supposed to pray harder? Read more? Write something profound?
Honestly, I didn’t know how to just be with God without trying to do something for Him. It felt awkward—like sitting across from someone I longed to know but didn’t know how to start the conversation.
Despite the initial challenges, I felt constantly drawn back to this practice. I yearned for more than hurried prayers and brief devotionals. I craved the depth of intimacy I read about in Scripture—how Jesus would often withdraw to lonely places to be with the Father. I wanted that kind of closeness. I wanted to slow down enough to hear the gentle whisper of God’s voice.
Over time, God graciously reshaped my approach to spending time with Him. I’ve had the gift of learning from wise mentors like Alan Fadling, Bill and Kristi Gaultiere, and Ruth Haley Barton. Through their writing and teaching, I’ve come to see that extended time with God isn’t about doing more—it’s about becoming more present. It’s about making space for God to speak, heal, guide, and love us.
Why Extended Time with God Matters
In a world that never stops moving, it’s easy to reduce our time with God to a checklist item—something to squeeze into the margins. I know I’m guilty of that more often than I’d like to admit. But God isn’t looking for our efficiency; He’s longing for intimacy.
Extended time with God creates space for my soul to breathe, for my mind to rest, and for my heart to listen. In those quiet moments, I remember who He is—and who I am in Him. This practice has brought me peace and clarity I never experienced before. It’s helped me better understand myself and navigate life's challenges with a deeper sense of purpose and direction.
My Monthly Rhythm
Today, I set aside extended time with God almost once a month, typically on a Friday. It’s become a sacred rhythm in my life—a monthly retreat for my soul. I understand that finding extended time, even just an hour, can be challenging, especially in our fast-paced world. But every time I prioritize nurturing my relationship with God, I walk away more rooted in His love, more aware of His presence, and more at peace with myself and the world around me.
A Simple Outline for Extended Time with God
If you’re unsure where to start, here’s a soul-centered framework I often use:
Extended Time with God: A Soul-Centered Framework
PAUSE:Enter the Space Slowly and Intentionally (10 minutes)
Find a quiet space. Light a candle if that helps you focus.
Take deep breaths. Let your body settle.
Pray slowly: “Here I am, Lord,” or “Jesus, I want to be with You.”
Gently name any distractions or emotions. Offer them to God.
BE:Embrace Silence and Stillness with God (10 minutes)
Rest in God’s presence with no agenda.
When your mind wanders, gently return to a simple prayer word like “Jesus” or “Abba.”
Talk with Jesus about how you are feeling: joy, fatigue, anxiety, peace.
Imagine Jesus with you. Ask: “Jesus, what do You want to say to me here?”
LISTEN:Hear God Through Scripture (Lectio Divina or Gospel Meditation, 20 minutes)
Read a Psalm or Gospel story slowly, 2–3 times.
Let a word or phrase stir in your heart.
Ask, “Lord, what are You saying to me through this?”
Use your imagination—enter the scene with Jesus and notice what unfolds.
NOTICE:Attend to How God is Responding to Your Soul (10 minutes)
Reflect: What surfaced—desires, questions, emotions, images?
Journal freely or take a short, reflective walk.
Simply rest in God’s love. Let His presence be enough.
THANK:Offer Gratitude and Carry It With You (10 minutes)
Ask: “When did I feel closest to God? What is He inviting me to carry forward?”
Close with a prayer of gratitude: “Thank You, Lord, for being with me.”
Write a final thought or intention to take into the rest of your day.
You can download a free PDF version of this guide here.
Try It: Your One-Hour Challenge
What would happen if you carved out just one hour this week to have extended time with God—no phone, no people, no distractions? Just you and Him.
Here’s my challenge for you: Pick one hour this week and create space for extended time with God. Use the framework above as a guide, or simply sit quietly and see where the Spirit leads.
Don’t overthink it. Don’t worry if it feels awkward. Just show up—and let God meet you there.
See what happens. Notice what stirs in your heart. Pay attention to what brings peace, what feels hard, and what surprises you.
You might not leave with all the answers, but you’ll leave with something even more valuable: a deeper awareness of God’s presence with you.
You’re Not Alone in This
God delights in spending time with you. If silence and solitude feel unfamiliar or uncomfortable, you’re not alone. This is a practice that takes time, patience, and grace to grow into—but I promise, the fruit is worth it.
As a certified Spiritual Director, I’d love to support you on this journey. If you’d like help incorporating extended time with God into your life, let’s set up a free 30-minute conversation at https://www.fulllifeforyou.com/getstarted. We’ll talk about your spiritual rhythms and explore whether spiritual direction might be a good fit for you.
You were made for deeper connection with God. You don’t have to figure it out alone.
Photo by Possessed Photography on Unsplash
